Dear Twitter,
I have fallen out of love with you. I’m sorry for being so blunt, but this has been a long time coming.
Now please don’t think I haven’t enjoyed our good times. You are one of the fastest ways to alert friends and colleagues of the über-important things going on in my life or that I’m thinking about at any given moment. You know, things like my joy about Kim Zolciak’s pseudo-video for “Tardy for the Party,” my all-caps “shouts” about Tevin Campbell appearing on the BET Awards and my intellectual back-and-forths about whether Megan Fox could play the role of Pizzazz in a Jem and the Holograms movie. You’ve kept me company at work and during depressing moments, such as the death of Michael Jackson, as well as helped me promote personal projects and organizations. There’s a certain allure to you, but alas, not one I can commit to and maintain with any sort of regularity.
You see, you have others who love you more ― but theirs is a love that is one-way, obsessive and abusive. They use you as the medium to channel their lives, which are so interesting that they must Tweet the mundane, such as “Driving to work” or “At lunch with @whocares at @trendyrestaurant. Thinking of having a @Sprite.” They express their opinions, seemingly with little regard to who may read/hear them and how the may feel, full of #fails, sucks or other snarky addendums. They re-Tweet quotes and meeting minutes ― ad nauseam ― which, as inspirational and/or informational as they may be, build a brick wall that seems to keep out the single Tweets of others.
And no one ever add me on #followfriday (except for @vettieroe … holla!).
Twitter, these people have caused you to become a distraction, the online equivalent to noise. Like The O’Reilly Factor, Al Sharpton and any Pitbull song, you say so much without truly saying anything.
I wish I could say that “it’s me, not you,” but it is you. I hope you can escape this abusive relationship. You deserve better, but ultimately, it’s you who has become empowered in order to emancipate yourself (or just malfunction, then we will have to Tweet like this).
Best to you. And if anyone reading this chooses to follow me, I won’t fight it.
J.Ly
